Autumn & Audiobooks: Listening Horoscopes for Every Sign

With every fleeting brisk moment at this transitional time I can’t help but heaving a sigh and going “oh, thank god.” Fall is about more than de-pilling your sweaters and ordering your overpriced coffee beverages hot and thanking the stars that the humidity might be coming to an end. It evokes nostalgia, comfort, and a moment to pause after summer.

The changing of the seasons always provides a reflection period, especially during the Autumnal equinox which contains equal parts day and night, making it the ultimate day of balance. Look back on the last 9 months and what those seasons were like in your own life. If fall is shaping up to be a wild time, think of the places you can find harmony and abundance, even after the equinox has passed.

Here’s what to expect (and what to listen to) this Autumn:

LIBRA

The great and powerful Leeb, happy season! An EQUINOX at the PRECISE MOMENT Libra season begins? It’s like you have a direct hotline to the universe, and you just called it up and asked “hey, can this be irrefutably my day?” Take this auspicious occurrence and use it as a moment to step into your power: sweep out the cobwebs and put what is no longer serving you on the curb (metaphorically or literally, either is good). It’s like you woke up in the perfect turtleneck you forgot you owned: you’re confident and the moves you make are the moves you mean.

SCORPIO

My beloved Scorp, I’m going to suggest you rein it in slightly to reset before your season (because we all know you’re waiting for your season—you have the energy of a witch brewing a potion under a sky suddenly swirling with dark clouds). Rather than keeping your packed party schedule going, might I suggest swapping your disco pants for yoga pants? A packed social calendar for a journal? Buy a crystal! Get a tarot reading! And lay low to conserve that wild, bewitching energy we know and love.

SAGITTARIUS

Pony, let’s chat. Usually you’re okay going where the wind blows, not following any kind of path, and frankly operating on pure vibes. But! What if, hear me out, you sat down for 20 minutes and thought about what you’d like to see for the next 3 months of 2023? You don’t have to make specific goals, but write down the kind of feelings you’d like to experience, and then operate from there. You’re still a beautiful golden leaf floating by, but you’ll be chasing something meant for you. Vibes, with direction, but not rigidity.

CAPRICORN

Alright, you’ve had your fun, sipped your spritz, and the changing of the seasons officially launching us into the back half of 2023 has you ready to hunker down and get to work. This is nothing new for you, you workaholic, but let us recall: balance. Sip something comforting while you write your mile long to-do lists, intersperse phone calls with loved ones with your meetings, buy a new pair of shoes on your lunch break. Say it with me: balance.

AQUARIUS

Shock to absolutely no one: you’re looking for ways to broaden your mind. Maybe you spent a lot of time this summer hanging out with the same people, and while there’s no problem with that, you need to infuse some freshness into your life. What you need right now is a little trip (solo, if you’re feeling so bold!) Choose somewhere that makes people ask “how’d you find yourself here?” and rely on your skills of exploration. If that’s not in the budget right now, pick a neighborhood or town nearby, and dedicate an entire day to exploring every inch.

PISCES

Blah blah blah Pisces are emotional blah blah blah. But at this time of year, maybe we can get a little more mystical! Let’s call your emotions your intuitions and use your rich inner life to do some autumnal manifesting. Develop a mantra for this season, and really hone in. The veil between our realm and the next is thinner at this time of year and if anyone is coaxing anything seemingly out of thin air…I think it’s you.

ARIES

Oooooh I see you getting all nostalgic over leaves and boots! Aries, you ol softy! You’re breathing in the air that starts to feel a little cold in your lungs, and are using your reminiscing as a jumping off point for examining your current life. What can you do to add that familiar warmth back into your life as a person who has grown? Get your hands in some clay, buy some overalls, wear a baseball cap. It’s a direct link back to the good parts.

TAURUS

Oy vey does your schedule need a switch-up! I understand: routines can be helpful and reliable! But they also run the risk of monotony. Consider this an official challenge to incorporate 3 things into your week that shakes things up, and makes it stand out from the last few. Nothing crazy: it can be as simple as taking a different route home from work. You are not a robot! Remember that!

GEMINI

You are walking around in a pink perfume cloud of l-o-v-e. I don’t just mean romantic love! But that is on the horizon too, if you so wish. You’re radiating the most caring energy right now: flowers are perking up when you walk by, new friends feel like they can tell you anything, and the things you love are coming at you in multitudes. You love a band? They’re in town. Been itching to update the wardrobe? Huge vintage flea market with pieces especially for you.

CANCER

Hello, I see you in your acts of service and quality time era, crabcake. To quote Beyonce, you’re feeling cozy: comfortable in your skin, nesting in your home, surrounded by people and things that bring you joy. You are a crow filling your nest with bottle caps. You don’t feel particularly pulled to go out right now, so bring the socializing in: host a dinner party (points for cooking seasonally), make collages, and make sure your home always smells like something is baking.

LEO

Put away that pout, cubby! I understand that summer’s end might feel like your time to shine is also coming to a close. You may have to work a little harder to give yourself a boost over the upcoming seasons. But remember: you’re someone bound to the sun. Your shine can never really dull. This is a great moment to reinvent and follow any pull you feel. Finally dive in to the full discography of the band who plays one of your favorite songs, learn what you’d look like if you dyed your hair green. You’ve got time.

VIRGO

I hope you enjoyed your season, you precocious little thing, because the rest of us were STRESSED. I’ll be blunt: it’s all about the cash for you right now. Did you buy yourself a birthday present? If not, do that now, then press pause on your spending. Think about how you’ve been spending your money over the last 9 months—This is a great time to reflect if you’ve been tossing around your extra dollars in a way that really makes you happy, or if you should shift your priorities. Allow space for surprise!